A Few Likes

They're not a lot, but just a few of my likes right now.

1. Spring is here! Well, in SC, Sprummer is here. Which is soon to be followed by Summer!

2. Krystian makes sure we say our prayer before every meal. Sometimes he forgets and then reminds us. He then says it with a mouth full of food. (It is also nice that Aydyn attempts to say the blessing with Krystian 99% of the time.)

3. Aydyn's favorite words/phrases: Alright, See you soon, and Uh.

4. My husband loves me and supports me in his own unique way..mainly silence, but I guess support is support.

5. I can finally feel like a good mom. Not because of people telling me that I am, but because our pastor has told us that Krystian is one of the happiest children he has ever met! To me, that means we are doing something right.

6. Reading other people's blogs. They inspire me even though I feel like I could never be as good as them.

7. Can't wait for the SplashPad this summer!

What are some of yours?

Negative Nancy

I love Sundays. Church refreshes me! After the past couple of weeks, I could use some refreshing of my spirit. Depression runs in my family, and I too have a tendency to get depressed. However, I enjoyed my Sunday even though I forgot to set my clock ahead an hour (and missed church because of it).

I spent most of the morning thinking about how my friends who blog are excellent and their lives seem almost perfect. Perfect husbands, almost perfect kids, friends, and hobbies. Then Krystian wanted to go outside. I spent the better part of the late morning outside with my children and my husband. God gave me this Sunday off from church so that I could enjoy the beautiful weather and family that he has provided me. While the boys played outside, I made a pizza and cut up some strawberries. I surprised them with a picnic lunch outside. Krystian LOVED it. We have planned a picnic for next Saturday with Grandma Eve :).

While my troubles are not even close to being gone, I did enjoy a gorgeous grace-filled day with my husband and children. My day that started out as a Negative Nancy day ended up to be pretty perfect.

As Krystian's grace from school says, "Thank you Lord for happy hearts, rain and sunny weather. Thank you Lord for this our food and that we are together. AMEN!"

Struggles

I know..who doesn't have them?! I am having usual Mommy struggles. I just am not used to them because I have never had a 4 year old and almost 2 year old before. Most of my struggles are with Aydyn, my more complex (a.k.a difficult) child. Although Krystian has had his moments.

Krystian's struggle for the entire year has been to learn to ride his bike. We got it for him really early like 2 years ago. He would ride it with someone pushing him, but then we quit pushing so he quit riding. Jake and I (mostly me) decided to dust it off and give it a go again. My dear sweet baby boy has become lazy. My in-laws have gotten each of my boys (against my wishes) a four-wheeler. Krystian knows that he can go to Grandpa's house and ride a four-wheeler that doesn't require any pedaling. Why does he need a bike?

Well, I am proud to say that after a few weeks and revelation from Lyn that he is outgrowing his bike, Krystian has learned to partially ride his bike. He only likes to do it in the drive way which is sloped. The road is too flat and still requires too much work. How did I do it? I found his weakness...FOOD! Haha! That's right I said food. Krystian said, "Mommy, I want a snack." I said, "You can have a snack if you try to ride your bike." After a second of thought, he said, "Ok." I got out the bike and helped him get on. He tried to pedal and the seat fell off. Jake didn't tighten it all the way the last time he raised the seat. I had to fix the seat and yes, I tightened it. Then Krystian got on and pedaled all the way down the drive way (almost hitting my car at the end). His reward were gummies for a snack. (Yes I use food as a reward when it works!)

Aydyn's struggles are a little more complicated. For starters, he is a picky eater. He would rather have junk food than anything healthy (except for carrots). Jake and I are of the belief that he will eat when he gets hungry, especially after talking to our pediatrician at his 20 month visit. However, my loving in-laws are of the idea let him eat what he wants when he wants. They kept my boys Saturday night. On Sunday Aydyn had the following: sausage and eggs (offered, but not eaten); Krispy Kreme donut (eaten); Cheese Nips (eaten); ribs, mac & cheese, lima beans, biscuit (offered, but not eaten); pork chops, scalloped potatoes, peas (offered, but not eaten). Thats right folks on Sunday all my son ate was a Krispy Kreme donut & Cheese Nips at church with my in-laws. I was not around. Monday was no better. He ate only the morning and afternoon snack at daycare. They had soup for lunch, and Aydyn doesn't eat soup...He had corn bread. He refused to eat dinner that night as well. My son went 48 hours without eating ANYTHING NUTRITIOUS! I am a HORRIBLE mother. I made the mistake of going to eat with my in-laws tonight because we fight every meal about how to feed Aydyn. Tonight was no exception.

My other struggle with Aydyn is more of Mommy Guilt. For Krystian's birthday, we bought 3 tickets to go see Monster Jam Monster Trucks in Jacksonville, Florida. Here it is Wednesday, we leave Friday, & I am totally hating the fact that I have to leave my precious baby boy for 3 days. I am going out of state and leaving him. I feel guilty! I know that I need to spend time with each of them, but I have not been away from him for more than 24 hours at a time since his birth. I feel like no one else can handle him the way that I would especially with this whole food issue. We will survive, but I had to vent.

Worst Check Up Ever!

When I had Aydyn, I realized that I would end up having two check up appointments to manage. I also decided to try to make as many as possible together. Today was one of those two children check up days. Krystian had to go in for his four year old check up, and Aydyn had to go in for his 20 month check up.

Aydyn's check up was not so bad. He weights 26 pounds and is just over 34 inches tall. He couldn't get his regular vaccines today because he hadn't been exactly 6 months, so he just got a flu shot (I know its late, but better late than never.).

Krystian's check up was fantastic until the shots. Lisa, the nurse (who is awesome), snuck in the hemoglobin test. He didn't realize what she was doing until she pricked his finger. He LOVES Dr. Mike! After Dr. Mike came in and checked him which he did well with, Lisa came back in with the shots. Krystian had to have 5 shots. It went a little something like this...Lisa holding Krystian's legs and giving shots; Jake at Krystian's head holding his hands; and me in the middle holding his stomach and watching his poor, poor pitiful face. I have never seen my baby boy cry like he did today getting his shots. Four years old is horrible! They know exactly what is coming and they HATE it. Yes, I cried when Krystian was a baby and got his first set of shots, but this was TEN TIMES WORSE! His face was red, the tears flowed like a river, and he screamed at the top of his lungs. At one point, Dr. Spence walked in to see if we needed assistance.

After today's experience, I have vowed NOT to take Aydyn for his four year old check up. That is all up to Jake. I cannot handle that pain any more.

The good news is that both boys are healthy and right on track. Aydyn is in the 90th percentile for his height. He's going to be tall and skinny like his daddy. Krystian will be short and dumpy like his mommy, but that is ok because I love them both with all of my heart.

Birthdays

We celebrate the usual holidays like Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving, and mild Valentine's Days, but my favorite days are birthdays for my boys. Ever since Krystian's first birthday, Jake has used his computer talent to make a movie of the year from birthday to birthday. I cry every year, and I sit here and watch him make it.

Tomorrow Krystian turns four. It is amazing to think that four years ago tomorrow, I was lying in a hospital bed strapped to pitocin (spelling, I know) so drugged up on pain medicine that I barely remember anything. I remember Dr. Rainwater saying that he wasn't dropping and that we would do a c-section. I remember Dr. Rainwater saying he was out and showing him to me. His cord was wrapped around his neck, and that is why he didn't drop. They suctioned him, and then handed him to Jake. Jake had the beautiful privilege of carrying Krystian to the nursery where they cleaned him up. The anesthesiologist tried talking to be, but the drugs were making me so sleepy I remember thinking that I just wanted to sleep. My mom who had come to see me early in the morning, but had to go back to work, ended up coming back to see me on her lunch break while I was in the recovery room. I got to nurse for the first time in the recovery room, and then we got to go back to our own room. Krystian was great at nursing. I just ate sausage biscuits every morning that I was in the hospital and it gave him gas. We were in the hospital for 5 LONG days. Jake had taken a week of vacation the week that Krystian was born, and we spent almost all of it in the hospital.

It is very hard to imagine that my little boy will be 4 tomorrow. I am excited, happy, sad, and nervous all at the same time! He was such a good baby. I could count on him to be calm and happy almost always. I had to fight Jake's family to accept the fact that I was breastfeeding, but they got used it. Krystian has taught me a lot over these four years, and my education continues! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, KRYSTIAN! :)

Guilty Feelings

I have been blessed with two beautiful boys. However, I am reminded daily, well actually nightly, how VERY different they are. Krystian is kind, loving, and will usually cuddle with you. Krystian loves to read and learn new things. We got him a Leapster Explorer for Christmas. He love his "game system."
Aydyn is the COMPLETE opposite. I call Aydyn my SourPatch kid...first he is sour, then he is sweet. Aydyn screams his head off when he doesn't get his way. Monday night he fought for an hour not to go to sleep. Then he got up at midnight and stayed up screaming and opening and slamming his door for an hour. I got 4 hours of sleep before work the next morning. I took Aydyn to Bi-Lo today to visit Jake and to order Krystian's birthday cake. The Pepsi guy called Aydyn "a sweet, little angel." I couldn't help but laugh (Jake did too so don't think I am heartless).

I feel guilty because God blessed me with Aydyn (and Krystian), and I get so anxious and frustrated with him. You know the saying, "Your children are payback for what you did to your parents." Was I really this bad?! Aydyn will get mad and if I am holding him, he will knock my glasses off my face. Or he will hit and scratch me. Bed time and nap time are always a fight. Meals are not as bad, but he can be picky. (Don't give him soup even if you drain the broth. If you call it soup, he refuses to eat it.) He has been known to throw dirty diapers off of the couch on to the floor. I pray every night for patience or some insight into how to deal with my child. I don't think it is good that I have started telling him not to call me when he gets arrested because my rule is that you spend one night in jail before I bail you out. If anyone has suggestions, please let me know! I am willing to try anything. If you know of a good book, please fill me in.

Before I end this entry, I want to point out three very positive traits about Aydyn: 1. Independent. He will do ANYTHING on his own. 2. Leader. Aydyn does everything in his own time. He won't do it a minute before he is ready. 3. Smart. We joke because his initials are APT, but he really is APT. I love my little SourPatch kid!

Exercise Day 1

I did it! I got my jello out there and walked/ran for 30 minutes plus a 10 minute warm up. I read a book about being a beginner runner. It has a 13 week program to get anyone to the point that they can run a 10K. Today's workout was supposed to be 1 minute running then 2 minutes walking (repeat 12 times). I was almost there. I had done 7 of these sets when two things happened: 1. 2 creepy guys started riding their bikes at the park where I was and 2. I realized the jello I would LOVE to get rid of couldn't be felt any more. So I gave up and left.

On one hand I am proud of myself for getting out there (It was 32 degrees with a wind chill of 27), but on the other hand, I should have stuck it out for the last 5 sets. Wednesday will be my next day on the track. I will do that one after work before picking up children. Hopefully it will be warmer.